I can spell, draw, and do math better than your kids, so I've taken the liberty to judge work done by children. New updates every week.
Stan, age 4
I wracked my mind trying to interpret what Stan was trying to draw, and have come to the conclusion that maybe he was trying to draw a dick. Maybe we need to stop looking for deeper meaning in children's artwork. Sometimes they just draw dicks. That said, he nailed it.
Jon, age 8
Ding Ding! Here comes the shit-mobile. I've never seen a fire truck that needed to be shaved. I would rather be burned to death than be saved by this hairy piece of shit.
Arturo, age 7
Not only are there flames being emitted from the jet pack in space, which is an affront to everything we know about astrophysics, but apparently mankind's first contact with an alien lifeform will be at the behest of a child, who will be on a first-name basis with the alien.

And this first communication that will go down in history and be quoted and etched in stone on our nation's capitals for millennia to come will be: "Hi Ouny ... Hi Arturo."

Kenny, age 5
No, Yoshi is not a single diner, let alone multiple diners. Nor is he a spice.
Rachel, age 7
That's interesting, everyone in this picture is white. Even the rainbow is white. Perhaps in an ideal world, everyone would be white isn't that right, Rachel? Or should I call you RACIST? Nice try, Hitler.
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